I feel i'm like what people call a free spirit. I'm rebellious, but not as a rebel. But i don't like people to hold me down...like example. This person...she cares. True enough, but she became a burden. Because of her...i couldn't stay up to play. I had to restrict myself and basically, be
Unnaturally safe. Not me at all. I prefer to throw myself into danger because that's how i learn. I learn as i get hurt. Unnecessary pain? All for the future. My dream is to be a psychologist, a full time performer or a teacher. But the biggest dream is to travel the world and finally settle down in Ireland...yaknw. Move to another state every few years. Visit all the continents. And...find someone who wants to do that with me, has similar dreams. I swear...when i find her, i'll never let her go. It's so easy to find someone who says she wants good grades, good school to good job to good life. Everywhere...but i've yet to meet someone who has similar dreams to me. I'm probably crazy to even think that someone has anything close but hey, it's a dream right? Dreams make life tolerable... Just have to get into Poly, that's where my life kicks off. a few more months seeing all this crap... When i get there. All the people who said otherwise...will finally shut up. Damn irritated by those noisy people who put others down for something they cannot do. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step, with the first step being the longest. I love my freedom. I hate being held down... By judgement, steteotypes. I go out of my way, dance in the street, play for families. And this term free spirit only describes how i am and not even who i am. I just am dying to be me...
I respect those who dare to speak up. People always tell me, stream. I say, stream? What stream? All equal to me. Infact, if they want to talk about stream? I'd say i admire more NA people than Express. More of them are friendly then the express. But no category here. There are reasons why some command respect and others beg for attention. Ability over attention. Some do their things, some do to get things. Some hide behind anonimosity and scold. Those are the worst. Cowards, those that hide behind their smokescreen, two-faced. Okay, to a certain extent many are two faced. But i mean two faced as, ready to betray his friends fast. These three are the most...disgusting. Literal of this word, attention beggars. Many in this school. Everywhere i look...
And...i've recently met this person. She's just the average girl. But somehow...she has something different. Can't quite put my finger on it, but something that intruigues me. And.. Just as the cards read. I still can't let go of someone old. So...which road should i pick?? The old won't take me, the new won't accept me. My bad~ and i'm awkward as hell around her. I don't even dare to look at her in the eye... Yes. I'm shy. It's been awhile... And the last person who made me feel that way ended in a wreck xP already losing my ability to predict... So i'm playing a fair game in love this time :) guess being the one who loves ends you hurt then as revenge...to avenge you hurt again? To myself...no more.
Health's been on a decline. Aneroxia(mild) been affecting me...and my migraines are coming back hard. Wonder how am i going to cope...
And this blind step is a step into an unfamiliar world of music and entertainment. Picked up by the busker communities and a talent show. Wow... Rare. And totally happy today... Saw her afew times too. Feeling very much...satisfied. Today really is some of my best days...
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