Genting and a crazy good holiday

Day 1
Oh well. Woke up early to cab down to the airport, then to KL, then over and up to Genting Highlands!! Slept most of the trip so i pretty much only remember some of the trip and reached around... 4. Went to take the indoor rides and some arcade games and wow. We came in for a real good sight. Someone told me that the outdoor premise is under renovation. What i saw was demolition.. anyway it was a really, really fun day albeit the kiddy rides. I learnt this, to see someone elses smile, i really am the kind to not mind going through shit as long as i can see it again. Look at my toddler brother. We were bored stiff on the slower rides but it was worth it seeing him laugh and all... And today i understand how much some people mean to me. Throughout the day, i kept thinking of the rgs team, my pds team, 5UP, some members from threesome and..Sleepover. I guess this is what it means to miss people huh..

But you know. There are still people and memories i'm struggling to forget. He resurfaced today and it struck me that.. i am fighting a passive battle against and i may lose many battles to depression, but once i lose the war, i lose my life. It is serious and oddly, its like the harder i fight the weaker i become. My mind is wearing down again... I dont want a round 3. I mean, i'm the kind of guy to give literally everything. I can't afford having people i would give everything for, walk in and out and keep hurting me like this. Life already lost its meaning. I dont want to lose the meaning of love too.. how many times can one's heart break and have a piece left to the other person before finally ending with nothing?

Day 2
Started out pretty late today haha after my dance prac late night. This ain't just a holiday its my personal dance camp too woo hoo. I have an aim. I wanna get into Dragon House someday.. Anyway. Started with a little arcade and just some light shopping and then back to the room for a little nap since the kid is tired out. TRANSFORMERS LATER. 3D TOO YEAH on the day of its screening. Im a happy man. Then tomorrow will be a day of shopping and more shopping. HEY ITS A 9/10!!! PRETTY FRIGGIN GOOD SHOW PLUS ON SCREENING DAY TOO!!

This is a familiar feeling. Not having enough rest and feeling the pressure on my back. And throughout the whole day i really cant seem to put my mind of things and yeah... I dont know what i'm waiting for, i don't know what i'm worrying about. And definitely this. Its not that some people come and in out when they want to. Sometimes, you meet that one person that only says hello and goodbye because they have something bigger to fulfill. And its what they were doing when you met them along the way, while they were doing so that captivates you and not them themselves and maybe if you took a little more time, you'd see how much it means to them and you haven't really seen who they truly are yet. And regrettably or not, they were only where you met them because they were doing what they were doing and once they're done, i guess its up to luck or fate to see if they will stay with you or not. Funny the things i takeaway on these trips.
There's a really strange thing too. Ever since i stepped into this room i've been having premonitions nonstop... It can be pretty damn tiring. Life lessons everyday and premonition every night..little wonder i grow out of a mindset so quickly..

Night 2. I sit out in the room.. listening to daughtry and i can't help but miss you. I know i've finally moved on but i cant put the memories down. I cant go back to how i was exactly before. It seems now i just miss the feelings and nothing else. And i cant cry out the frustrations and someone told me this. Its sad to see someone unable to cry because they've been sad for so long they're numb to it already and crying no longer makes a difference. Memories haunt me so hard.

Day 3.
Not much of shopping, just passed the time and suddenly, its 5 and im waiting for takeoff. Suddenly i'm back in sg and the next thing i know, i'm in studio A doing hip hop again. Its tiring.. but today is among the most refreshing ones too. I guess krish has some say in my mind and yeah. It was something minor and i'm taking a ridiculously long time. I think i've had enough and yeah. I'm not gonna be sitting down on my ass and lamenting about why and what should have happened. And i'm ready for something new. I feel freshness seep into my mind and.. it took me awhile but i'm no longer a prisoner in my mind because of someone. At least, that's until the next one..

Tired.

Dance at its finest and most free, in self expression. Anger, sadness, pain. Happiness, laughter and joy. The freedom in movement is amazing and now, i need a dance partner.

I think... Its been enough time to get over something that happened in just a day. That's whats everyone is telling me. She's not worth it, she's not worth a fraction of what you give, she's not even supposed to happen to someone like you. Who am i kidding. I nod and agree and honestly only until now, i'm finally tired out. Of feeling sad over her and getting seriously emotional and having him run rampant in my head. But what happened yesterday just caught me off guard. I still do have a long way to go, just not a long life to live. I saw a particular girl. That one i... Have regrets letting go. I never knew seeing someone have that gleam in their eyes could be this freaking attractive and well, now i do. But alas. Raised with the mindset of a guardian. Forever to take the side of the hurting and that is the only flaw i wish i didnt have. Love touches for a second but scars for a life time. The second scar is now ingraved and i guess.. i'm finally ready to move on. From what i see of myself, i'm almost out of the mess i walked into. And once i finally do, i will never turn back.

But... For some god forsaken reason. I really do miss her.. but now its not just her alone. Seems someone is inching her way into my attention..

What's the point..

"Just like the break of spring, flowers bloom and grasses grow and life blossoms and the world seems much brighter. Just like the beginnings of life, and of love.

Summer is when the heat is the strongest, when the passions flares and unbearable at times but memorable all the time. And here is when bonds are forged into steel and smiles are everywhere.

Fall is when feelings start to sour, the cold sets in for the first time. Friends and couples look down at their feet, missing the memories more than the person in front of them, where the bonds face the test of time.

Winter is silent outside, but warm inside. Familes huddle close and lone wolves roam the night. Bonds are set for life and those that are meant to wander spend their whole lives alone and it is a miraculous sight to see these people find their partners, for you see the sweetest Spring in the coldest of Winters.

And for that, the man caught in the storm and yet only laments, will live another day in their plight and the man who fights his way through the silent winter savours the sweetest springs, the warmest summers and the cosiest falls, but contented will always be the man who appreciates the bitter of winter."

I think this is really cool. Been going through my head for quite awhile now so.. decided to write this out.

Yknw, i've been meeting lots of really interesting people. But i really hate that trapped feeling, that phobia of getting close to another person again. Look at Iris. Keller. Gillian. Sometimes i want to get to know them more but... Sigh. Its just me. Even if shit hadnt happened i wouldnt have the guts to talk to them either.. even to guys. I cant hold a proper conversation without feeling that paranoia that they might betray me somehow. This is stupid..

Im thinking. Maybe by doing what i did... Its. The better choice in the end. Yeah... I miss yhe way things were, but i also prefer to not see the other outcome.

6 days of hell

So well this post is for the whole... Last sunday to today. Went out with 5UP for a movie that was super in 3D called How to Train Your Dragon 2!!! Then we went for a little dance sesh and pool and dinner at Astons!! Yummy :p i remember going home with quite the grave resolve. It was going to be among the most hellish weeks in my life, and i was not disappointed one bit.

Day 1
PDS camp day one. Getting ready and seeing the cadets. It is really weird to see all sec 1's and 2's attending and here is the toughest part. They are all absolutely new to pds and well for me.. i am absolutely new to teaching the younger cadets sighs. So yeah. Started with light pt and stretching and all and it was really fun because by the time it was three, i remember why i loved pds so much. You can exert all your anger onto the rifle with the music and when the edge of the rifle flows in full circles, it could be some of the most satisfying things in the world. Fancy style PDS is considered to be a sport of high danger and by doing tosses and all and if you are not careful you could die. And yes i practice that. I always end up with cracked fingers and bruised knees and once, a damaged right arm. To the new cadets we look like gods haha nahh. Taught the first 12 drills and went home.

Day 2
As usual, MORNING PT MUHAHAH by this time the cadets are pretty much aching all over but the instructors well... The morning pts are more like warmups. By today we managed to finish most of the 19 drills and by today i noticed the rgs,  cgs and some from cbss and especially kristabel. She wasnt doing well and she couldnt remember the drills..
The instructors went back to fancy style and i reopened an old injury ._. Sighzxc

Day 3
Test day. Morning pt yet again and we let them go for lunch, revision of the past 3 days and i kept on playing with their minds muhahah. Kept on preparing all of them for the worst and after the test, out of 15,9 passed the first test. But i told them that they were those that failed so badly they werent even fit to take the retest and while the other 6 retested. 2 more passed... Oh og i remembee this. I took brian's paper and tore it infront of him. Well it was a spare so... Yeah. Some of the cadets nearly cried but i swear. Its so... I mean theres that fuzzy feeling in my heart when i see their face changes when they find out that they'd passed. And they passed out. And right after i stepped out i realised something. I finally, finally forgot about her and in the three day, i finally felt happy and like me without her. But whats the plot twist? FB camp tomorrow...

Day 4
I am struggling to keep awake as we gather in Block E. Grouped up. Siasuay la... Went to ice breakers. Couldnt really remember what happened because i was really that tired. Then the dance sharing... I kept losing control of my body. Too burnt out by pds and i swear all i wanted to do was to rest. Dinner, shower and i got to know a really sweet girl named Iris. Dann cute haha she made the pinky promise with me after she read a tweet that i will tell her what made me sad. Ah... Nothing much for first day. All i remember is a mess of emotions and tiredness and i was really just off the whole damn day till evening during dinner. Yeah..

Day 5
MORNING PTTTTTT okay here i remember clearly i hyperventilated and my right tricep was hurting so bad because of bboy. Pretty fucked up injury there and all of my old injuries opened again. It was a pretty darned painful morning for me. Dance sesh of locking, waacking, hip hop and house took a huge chunk out of me because i drain quickly under choreo sighh. Doesnt change the fact im already so fucking tired because i kept waking up every hour the night before. Horror movie before the nightwalk. Well the movie was more gory so i couldnt really take it but overall, not too bad. Then the night walk...3 sightings. Not traumatised in any way but just found them so close to me a little unnerving. The night walk was scarier because of jt and zaki. My god... Their grip is godly. JT GRIP IS SO HARD ON MY ARMS AND ZAKI YOU GAY FAG HAHAHA ohwell its for fun.

Day 6
Camp was finally ending. I can finally rest but not before a self choreo showcase. I drained especially quickly today and i learnt something about myself. FB isnt really a place for me. I cant take choreo and i prefer to dance alone or with close friends. There are so many more personal reasons but mainly.. i didnt feel happy in this camp. Looks like i might quit anyway. Or to be more precise, i dont feel happy dancing in fb.. and yeah. I dont like to bond with others.ah...

I am fucking sick of... Always being there for someone and worrying for them and watching them from far and making sure they are alright. I've been the nice guy for too long and its going nowhere. I dont want to feel that kind of emptiness waiting for someone. The whole damn camp... Any free time was spent thinking what went wrong and where i could be better. I swear my mind never stops. I want go give up right now and not have like, 4-5 people run through my head.

I'm not in love with a person. It's more like a dead memory right now... Slowly but surely. I think after this i wont try anymore. Why would i dare to anyway?

PICS!!!!

Stargazer

And it looks like i'm looking at me myself when i see her. This is among the most curious, entertaining, intruiging, weird, strange and probably the oddest feeling ever. She has the same drive as me(okay maybe similar not the same) to make that significant other smile. And... To make that person happy. It's real strange because i honestly thought that it's a dying tradition and i'm like one of the few left to have this kind of well, motivation. I really have much more to see eh..but the difference between us is that i'm a really negative, dark and moody person and she's bubbly and cheerful and lively. Maybe i cant see through the facade or i'm plainly blinded by the past but i'll take my time around things. Never gonns rush to secure something anymore. This is another weird feeling that came along with knowing her. I don't like her in that way, or am i close to her, or am i in anyway someone to her but i really trust her and i want to talk to her. I'm a little freaked out hehm. I have to feel really lucky to meet what i consider 'rare' thrice in the span of half a year. The astrology is really working for me woo~ she's like the cutest person ever when she starts spazzing LOLOL okay i should stop heh.

Always dancing late into the night and regretting the next morning but hey. Its dance. So jeremy said that dance is like food.. for example. Hip hop is like rice cus its the basis of everything. Then the meat and vegetable is the moves you have and the gravy is your essence HAHA FUCK but still its quite true. I should start carving something out of my animation. And all i have is 5 days to do it it seems..i need to get something out before dance camp. Personal aim to improve too..

I think... After spending so many hours alone. I think, im starting to think i might have finally gotten over the pains and shitm but the flames always rekindles everytime i see the person and i dont know.. my dreams are becoming more and more vivid. Maybe one day that only sweet dream i had might come true? But still. I wish i wasnt the kind of be so... Honest and loyal. And the type to not like to hurt people because i'm good in emotional dominance. Both visible and invisible and if its the latter, also unknown to me because well, its not me doing the shit. I do pretty well in reverse psychology unknowingly and only to realise what i done days later and to regret and hurt. I think its nice for a guy to be sensitive, but not to my level. Its not fun i swear... You feel the fear of others when they feel scared. Damn..

I think i want to sit and lie down under the stars again. With someone important and talk about life again. Because no matter how big the troubles your mind says it is, when returning to nature your mind relaxes and well, at least for me. The night air and clear skies and trying to figure out which lights in the sky are satellites and which are stars. Its always refreshing and a huge recharge for me but to allow someone to do it with me is well, thats huge cus thats me in my rawest form. I think how the stars forms and planets flies across the universe and how small you really are and i realise again. Maybe my problems have a solution and im sure as hell gonna try again

I miss that idiot..

Ghost of my mind

And it could never be any harder living another day trying to make people happy and yet minute by minute the past just keeps on haunting. All that about putting the past down.. every second i'm fighting old battles and every day new ones burden on me. Horrible.

And ever since i did the rebalancing. Hallucinating... My god that is the worse but the images i see.. Horrifying,terrifyingly creepy. It's like the ghost of my mind is starting to come back alive. Walk down the long walkway. Where i turn around i see... Scenes of old. Me and her walking together..the first time i saw my father sad all catching up to me. Look up ahead, i see what could have been and what should have been and what's to come. Everything now is oddly colored and i guess it might be just me but i see the world now in 4 layers. As it is, the emotional side, the side that is only visible to certain individuals who go through shit harsh enough to alter them 360° and more and now,spiritually. It's rather appaling to see holes everywhere in friendships and relationships of other people. I see the backstabbing and the ill wills but on the physical side all i see is smiles. I see who is really happy and who is not and more recently, i've been seeing auras clear as day. And because of this i lose my energy in the day and i see things.. that keep people up at night. The visions i see. One was about me and this is the second time i see it. It seems... I dont have long to live.. the rest were all misfortunes befalling people around me. And i feel rather.. indifferent to that. I'm a horrible guy.

Training ended today on a sour note. I'm starting to feel the consequence of being burned so hard. One part of me has shut off. How am i supposed to be able to dare to go close to anyone now when everytime i do, its now the memory of 3?
That bears down on me and makes me question myself things like 'are you sure you want to hurt them?' Or things like 'you're not good enough' i hate it now that i used to be someone that would try to get people back on their feet and watch them try again. Seems like that's something about me that's never coming back.

Yaknw. I dont want to try anymore. Its a first in quite a long time. I want to give up... I dont want to try to make things better anymore. I'm damn sick of this shit i can never understand why i always want to do so much for shitty people and for people who are just going to keep on hurting me. Oh wait, now i do know. Just to make them happy. Load of bullshit this is.

Fb tomorrow

And another week's passed, another day gone in that kind of stupid confusion. I have a huge,huge load of my back knowing she is safe. Odd that i haven't talked to her for so long and yet she still can affect me this much. And yeah nothing makes me happier than knowing that my sis is happy. Woo
But still.
Things i cant quite put my finger on. I swear the flat was empty but there were two...'things' inside the flat. One was just a black mass and the other was a floating red cloud. And the other thing was they were so obvious the moment i stepped out of the lift. Gah... I swear tonight will not be a good night.

And today i get all kinds of bullshit. I dare say this, this person who simply disregarded me and betrayed me. Maybe not the same way as the others. But this, i dare say i stood up for you and i felt for you and what happens? You start talking shit behind my back. How very nice of you. It's weird how... You know how much i dislike people doing that and normally, all respect for you will be gone and yeah. I don't know how i'm going to talk to you ever again or how i'm ever going to look you in the eye the same way again. Disgracing what i did for you. Tsk. I hate people like that

And here comes the hardest part of getting over shit. After the initial shock, there comes the grief and anger and sadness. Then the point where you start convincing yourself otherwise. The feelings start to numb. Here comes the. hardest part, the feeliings are no longer numbed and full effect of everything just comes down on me. I dont feel like collapsing or crumbling anymore. I guess i got so pissed off with myself that i just walked away from that. I just really, really feel like shit.

Sleepyyyyyyy

I just find it a little... Odd that anything that happens now can remind me of something that happened so long ago. I mean, to remind me of a side i so painfully put down last year that ruled my mind since i could remember anything at all. A solemn, stone cold heart absolutely devoid of feelings and emotions. I do miss that period in time... That also happened to be the time i could play with emotions really well. I still can now, except with a high cost and only for a good reason. But back then, so break a heart was to toy with a flower. I'd pluck the petals so easily and break the stem and leave the remnants to rot among the grasses. Until a certain someone came along and for the first time in my whole life, it was weird the way she replied me then. I toyed with her for over 6 months and when she finally said, 'good luck to you too' i was actually... Shaken. It was the first time i felt the loss of a friend and that gave me a long and hard transformation period, along with the breakup and it didn't help that at that time, it was O levels and my family wasn't doing well and people were arguing. And it seems i turned out just the way i needed to be. With one major flaw i guess... I turned out a little more.. Loyal than i like. I mean, what's the point when i can commit and give so much and get hurt in the end? I still like how i got the darker traits of my parents and my brother got the more innocent traits of them. He got their rational mindset, i got the emotion. He got the sharp tongue i got the sweet talker and so on. Just... Pondering ehehe.

And it seems that the burden on my heart is lightening. Forgiving someone really feels enlightening hehe. It seems that i hated this person to the core and yes knowing me, i do really harsh things but when i saw this person find happiness again, i started to feel the forgiveness and i finally put down my grudge. I really am stupidly kind. Forgiving someone because they're happy... Still one more person to go

Dance has been going well. My hits and animations are turning smoother and bugger and more impressive but it's still not camera worthy yet. Joining fb... Might take too long to get the results i want. I mean i need te basica but this is way too slow. I want to get into the specialisations and the hard, hard popping trainings. But even then i'm still not so convinced that fb can give me what i want..

Gah. I should never ever learn a song because of someone. Now that's a song i can't play because whenever i do it reminds me of her. Ah... I really am very bitter inside. Giving so much to make others happy that i forgot about the repercussions of doing so. Giving by taking... Would cause that bitterness to stay inside me and when shit goes down that same thing grows. I won't lose rein of my feelings so easily but it seems they won't let me control them that well either. I miss the feeling of... Falling in love. When you see the person and all you think is' wow, why am i so lucky to have found her' and you don't mind giving more to make her happy. I miss the feeling of being there for someone so much that i'm the first person they turn to and wanting to be there so much they're all i think about sometimes. And definitely this, the feeling when you know she feels the same way. Wow.. I miss that.

I wonder why i will give so much to that one person. No, i'm starting to wonder if it's even right to be giving so much and to be willing to do so much. I see superficiality wherever i go. Maybe because i was raised by the older generations and my mindset is really old ( when you have my word, you can count on me) ghe english gentlemen age. My pledge is my bond and my promise becomes my prison if... The other person leaves. I promised forever but its starting to seem a little long without her there with me huh.

Siann

Foreign Bodies first prac today! It was much, much fun but still. Dance pt and stretching is new to my body and no matter how conditioned i am i still have some... Aches. I dont think i'll walk the best later aye? So today was with Gilian megan keller wei xin and isabel woo hoo. Enjoyed and laughed and damn the training had its fair share of tough. Not the hardest, but not a walk in the either. And meeting the fb group reminded me this, to not get so attached because people are of all kinds and there are really much more than meets the eye and what you see, might sometimes be what you get if you didnt get paranoid over everything. But i just hate how... At that one point in pt where my arm nearly dislocated and i could feel the pain in my bones and guess who was the person i first thought of? And gues what. I got the energy to carry on and even push twice as hard as before and yeah because of that i re-injured my arm HAHAHAbut small matter. Being me, 2 days is all i need to get back up and running heh. But hey. Today was good for another reason. Damn... I'm going to sound pedo here fuck. There were some girls who were simply stunning and they looked just amazing and that was a teeeeeeny part of tiding the pt over hehe. Heh. Hehe.

And after i set things straight in my head last night everything blossomed up to me. I talk to people much easier now, i move much easier and i even see people in a different light. I remember that time how i shut out my eye to other girls totally. Seems like... I'm almost back to the me before i came into poly and once i do. I've decided on this. I'm not gonna trust any other girl other than my sister until i find that one. And you know, since i set my stuff straight last night there are some people who started... You know. Becoming even more obvious to me. People who would never even cross my mind became more defined the way i see them. This always happens whenever there's a significant change in my life. Yeah... Thats almost every few months. I can't settle down so i guess if i ever settle down for that person, she earns so much.

I saw the questionnaire about personality and it asks

Think of an ocean. What is the first image that comes to mind? That's your emotions and the way you see life

The way i see it, deep and dark and never ending, and never to be fully explored. And they say, the oceans affects the spin of the world. One small disturbance by someone important can cause this entire thing to shift. This applies to only one of my feelings. It's little wonder if someone that important to me quarrels... I change so quickly. And yeah it hurts because i cant settle down. Finally i thought when i'm done, i'm thrown another thing to worry, or to be angry at or something and i'm starting to tire.

I hate how life can be really unfair. And today took things to the next damn level. Things always happen to others and bad things and disaster always to people not so close and all you do is pity them but what i saw took my breath away. Literally.

The ang mo kio murder-cum-suicide...is the family of the closest friend to my sister and i know her too. And suddenly, it makes me cherish life a lot, lot more and i dont know how to feel. Even me, i feel the kind of emptiness and i can only imagine how she feels. Yeah. All of a sudden, i really want to be there for her. It's like i can forget so much and suddenly be the strongest person on earth once someone i knows needs the support to get over the dark period. And this... Is the darkest point of her entire life up till know. Yeah. I dont know where she is i dont know what's happening to her and yeah. I'm worried.

By Daybreak... I must be okay again. I will be.

 I think i get it when people tell me,'you will understand someday'. The things they do, you will never see but feel only after a long time and when you think back you only wonder, and maybe even feel guilty for not understanding them then. I really understand it now. And it never occured to me how much it would hurt to do things for someone and never let them know why and only hope they will understand.Never has reality dawned on me so hard so quickly that i buckle like this and what more an inopportune time to need someone to lean on really. I'm someone that grows when i'm alone and i love to be alone. Lonliness doesn't affect me but this. This is my first time experiencing the fear of lonliness. I feel the fear in my throat and the pits of my stomach falls and my heart is pressed hard to my ribs and i really feel like breaking down but i cant. Thats the worse part. I cant seem to let out any more than just a sigh and the emotions are building up and when they do come out unbounded by my mind, i hope you will be there. Its been long since i feel towards not of committing suicide but of running away. From everything that's happening and from everything that's about to happen. It's maybe the only other time i finally feel the real, sincere need to have someone there for me but here will forever be the problem. I dont have the heart to burden my family with these feelings of mine, and i definitely do not want to add onto the pressure on my brothers and sister, and... I only trust most people to let them see how i feel but not why. Maybe there is one person. But not her too.... I promised not to drag her into any more of my shit and i promised to be the one protecting her. My my... Tonight will be a harsh night. A really harsh night indeed. I can't wait for pds camp. 

And looks like from past it has taught me that being the one that's willing to give more, you'll lose out. Being the kinder one, you'll be hurt. Being the nicer one, you'll be trampled, crossed, played out and used. And this is what i learnt, not to shut out the world and never be those again but to shut out the people who take advantage of you. And i do that a little too well i think. The show i put up... No one has seen through it yet but that's also where it's scary. It's not really a facade. I wish it was simply a mask...

I have a debt to pay. A huge debt indeed, in money and in favour. And all the mental restructuring and meltdowns that happens nearly everyday. And the recurring memories and the never ending nightmares. And the mistakes i've made. And i find it weird why i can only find peace that i need so dearly in the presence of someone i'm in love with but at the same time the chaos that results because of the conflict in what i want to do, and what i need to do. The people i lost. The things and people that were taken from me. And when the things i fight so hard for hurt me in the end, and everything just comes down on you, it can be a little hard to look up to the sky and say i'm happy to be alive...

I hate relying on people. I guess that might be why i'm so harsh on myself. I don't want to feel vulnerable infront of anyone else except for that one person who deserves to see all of me as who i am. 

And i see the shadows in your eyes, when you have a million things to say,

And when you look down to the floor when you need a hug, and when you scratch your ring on your wrist because you miss the blade, and when your fingers trace your scars when you're falling apart inside.

You've been losing sleep and you've been losing weight, your laughter sounds so empty and you tell me you're okay.

To be very honest, i actually... Need a shoulder to cry on. Someone to comfort me. Writing out shit like this helps so much but nothing beats knowing that someone is there wishing and waiting, and maybe even caring for you.

"A guy like me is a dime's a dozen but a girl like you is a diamond in the rough"